KON (Trassato Crime Family Book 2) Page 11

  “So what? I’m twenty-eight, not sixteen. I don’t need to tell you guys where I am every second of the day.”

  “Madon!” My mom jumped to her feet, a red blush staining her cheeks. “When you still live under my roof, you are accountable to me. That means taking the time to give me a courtesy call or text to let me know you won’t be home. I don’t think that’s too much to ask, do you?”

  “No. I forgot, and my phone ran out of charge. I’m sorry, Mama, but you didn’t need to worry. I’m a big girl. I lived on my own for three years before Dad died.”

  “What are you talking about? You need me. I feed you, I clothe you, I give you a place to live. And all I ask in return is for you check in with me so I’m not up all night worrying about you.” A tear trickled down her face, and she might as well have stabbed me in the chest. “I lost my husband not too long ago. I can’t take this, Carmela. I feel like I aged five years last night. I kept picturing you dead or injured in some alley somewhere.”

  “I’m sorry I upset you,” I mumbled, shame and frustration bottling up in my chest. I hadn’t set out to hurt her or my family, and I didn’t do anything thousands of other twenty-eight year olds did every day. “You’re probably right. It’s time for me to get my own place again. This was only meant to be a temporary move.”

  My brother crossed the room and stood only a foot from me. “How are you going to do that? You don’t have a job, you don’t have any income except what comes from the family.”

  “I have money. I do design jobs on the side.”

  “Oh, I know all about your design jobs, and they won’t keep you afloat. Not in New York.”

  “Are you threatening to cut me off?”

  He cocked his head to the side. “You tell me, Carmela. Should I cut you off?”

  “What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”

  Evie jumped up. “Guys, stop it. Don’t fight. You’re upsetting your mom more. Carmela made a mistake. It’s not a big deal. She came home in one piece. That’s all that matters. Cut her some slack.”

  “Evie, take my mom for a walk. I want to talk to my sister alone. We have a few things to discuss.”

  Sighing, Evie stood, and grabbed my mom’s hand. “Show me the flowers the gardener planted yesterday.” She paused at the glass patio door and glanced over her shoulder. “Gian, remember that Carmela gave us space when we got engaged. She supported us. We need to do the same for her.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Get out of here, Evie. Have a little faith in me. I’m not going to be a jerk.”

  The door thudded closed, and Gian sighed heavily. “Tell me what’s going on with you and Konstantin Trincher.”

  I wanted to deny everything. My brother had lied to me about his engagement with Evie. I didn’t owe him the truth, but his hands sliced through the air, stopping me in my tracks.

  “You can stop right there, Carmela. I want the truth. I can’t protect you from the fallout if you keep me the dark.”

  “The fallout. What fallout?”

  “Mom called Nico first thing this morning when you didn’t come home last night. We had to call him back later this afternoon and tell him you were sick and not to come over tonight.”

  “So? Nico doesn’t own me. I can do what I want without his permission.”

  “You’re his fiancée. What’s he supposed to think when you disappear overnight?”

  “That I was busy. That I have a life. That I have friends. Honestly, I don’t care. Nico and I aren’t like you and Evie. He doesn’t love me, and I don’t love him.”

  “You’re sadly mistaken, Carmela. He won’t overlook what happened last night. Even if he truly doesn’t care, no man wants to look like a fool.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Don’t play games with me. I know you spent the night with Konstantin Trincher, and if I know it, you can bet your ass Nico knows it too.”

  I stopped breathing for a second, my mind racing in time with my blood pressure. “How did you find out? Do you have people watching me?”

  “Of course I do. You’re my sister. After everything that our family’s been through in the past couple of years, I won’t let anything happen to you. I can’t. It’d kill me.” He steepled his fingers together in front of his mouth, his eyes distant. “I promised Dad I’d make sure you were taken care of and happy. That’s all I want. That’s all Mom wants too.”

  “I know. I’m sorry if my decisions hurt you guys. I love all of you, you know that. I can’t make choices solely to make my family happy, though, and right now that’s what it feels like. I know everyone expects me to marry Nico, and I’m scared to death that it will be a terrible mistake.”

  For a beat, panic spread across Gian’s face, his eyes wild, his mouth ajar. He shook his head. “Konstantin will destroy you. You realize that, don’t you? Nico may not be the love of your li—”

  “He’s not. Rocco was. That will never change. Anyone who comes after him is a cheap imitation.” My voice was a little unhinged. Hell, I felt a little unhinged.

  Last night with Konstantin had me a little off balance in more ways than one, and that was before I walked into something that resembled a family intervention. Sex had never been like that with Rocco. Being intimate with him was like slipping into an old, favorite pair of jeans. Everything was familiar. Sweet even.

  In contrast, last night with Kon was explosive, passionate, and greedy. He felt incredible. He tasted wonderful. He smelled…perfect. That was why I needed to reel myself in before I confused sex for love.

  “Sweetie.” Gian placed his hands on my shoulders, a look of pity on his face. “You shouldn’t keep Rocco on a pedestal. He wasn’t perfect. He did dumb shit, made bad decisions. He’d still be alive if he had walked away from that fight with the DiTonno kid. He had no business being there that night. Too many people died because of his choices.”

  I slumped back into the couch, feeling frustrated and foolish. “What did he do?”

  “Let the dead be dead, and forgive their trespasses. There is no point in dredging up history. It’s a waste of time and energy.”

  “Was Rocco cheating on me before he died?”

  “We’re not having this conversation.”

  “Just tell me. I need to know. We fought that night, and I can’t stop feeling guilty about the things I said to him. Maybe if I knew he wasn’t innocent I could get closure.”

  “Honestly, Carmela, I don’t know. Where’d all this come from? Did Nico say something?”

  “No.” I chewed on the corner of my lower lip, plotting my response. “I overhead someone saying one of the DiTonnos killed Rocco over a woman.”

  Gian glanced to the side, his eyes glinting with something. Anger? Sympathy? When he faced me again, he had scrubbed all traces of emotion. “Marco?”

  “I guess. I didn’t catch his name.”

  “Shit, I won’t lie to you. You deserve truth so here it is. Before he died, there were rumors. I confronted Rocco and he denied it. He had excuses and alibis, and most of them made sense.”

  Dread settled deep inside of me and cotton gathered in my mouth, my self-preservation begging me to halt the line of questioning. “Did you believe him?”

  “I knew him my whole life, and I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe I shouldn’t have. He might not have died if I had pushed harder.”

  The words left a gaping chasm in the heart I thought I no longer had. It was as close to an admission as I’d ever get, yet it didn’t give me comfort or closure. Not even close. On the contrary, it made me feel worse than before, and I was sick and tired of feeling shitty about everything in my life.

  “You think he was cheating on me.” My voice shattered on the last word and with it came the urge to cry. I swallowed, but it did nothing to stop the inevitable. Pain, sorrow, and regret inched up my throat. A whimper echoed through the room.

  Oh God. Not again.

  Between my dad and Rocco, I thought I had shed all the tears allott
ed to me in this lifetime. Apparently, I was wrong. The possibility that my relationship with Rocco was one-sided made me want to take a scalpel to my chest and carve out the shattered pieces of my heart along with every memory of us together.

  “Carmela, come here.” Gian pulled my cold and trembling body into his arms, holding me close for a few beats before releasing me. My vision was fuzzy around the edges and my stomach swirled with nausea. I had to be in shock. “Don’t do this to yourself. Rocco loved you, don’t ever doubt that. And there’s nothing you can do to change the past. Rocco and Marco are dead, so we’ll probably never know the truth. Let it go. Let Rocco go. Please.”

  He was right. It was easier said than done, though. Grimacing, I swatted away the salty tears burning my cheeks. “So I can marry Nico and live happily ever after?”

  He grasped my chin with enough force to get my attention. “I thought you liked Nico. I thought you wanted to marry him.”

  “Oh please, you’re my brother. Don’t you know me at all?”

  He frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “When we’re together, I don’t feel anything for him. Just a lot of nothing. Maybe I’m getting cold feet about the whole thing and looking for reasons not to marry him. I mean…you and Mom like him, right? And Dad trusted him or he wouldn’t have put the whole thing in motion. Maybe I’m too fucked up to see a good thing even when it’s in front of my face.”

  “Nico and I don’t always see eye to eye. He pissed me the fuck off before Evie and I got married. Lately he’s backed off, though, which probably has more to do with you than me.”

  “That’s not exactly comforting.”

  He squeezed my upper arms. “You don’t have to marry him. We can find a way out of this. I want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy after everything that’s happened to you.”

  “But Mom—”

  “Will get over it. Sure, she’ll be embarrassed and she might yell at you. Her anger will pass. You know how she is.”

  “What do you think I should do?”

  “I won’t force you down the aisle. Follow your heart.”

  I nodded, staring absently at the family picture above the fireplace. I guess in a small way I was lucky my dad wasn’t around. He would force me to marry Nico without batting an eye. He was more old school than Gian. Be that as it may, Gian’s support might not help me.

  “Doesn’t matter what you do if Uncle Dominick decides otherwise.”

  His expression darkened, and his jaw tensed. “Yeah, but you have a better shot of changing his mind if I’m on your side. I’m sure we can come up with some dirt on Nico to make Dominick think twice.”

  “Maybe. We can figure it out later. I’m starving.” I smiled, signaling the end of our conversation. “Did you guys already eat dinner?”

  “No. We were waiting for you.”

  “In that case, I’ll go find Mom and Evie, and let them know it’s safe to come back inside.”

  When I pivoted to leave, he grabbed my hand. “I want to clarify one thing. I’ll support your decision to break things off with Nico, but all bets are off if I find out you’re hanging out with Konstantin Trincher.”

  “What are you saying?”

  “I want you to cut all ties with him. He hurt Evie. I won’t let him hurt you too when we both know things with him won’t end well. Can you do that?”

  Apart from stiffening, I didn’t react. “It won’t be a problem,” I agreed, my voice thin like a frayed rope.

  It was a flat out lie. I had no intention of kicking Kon out of my life. Last night’s attempt to get him out of my system had categorically failed. Only an hour had passed since I left his place, and I already missed him. Missed his touch, missed his cocky grin. It was too early in our non-relationship to miss him, which said a lot about how deep my feelings for him already ran. Honestly, I couldn’t remember feeling so much for anyone after such a short period.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Konstantin

  “Carmela,” I whispered when she crossed the threshold of her bedroom. I’d been waiting here for over an hour. Dumbest fucking move I’d ever made considering Gian’s car was sitting in the driveway when I scaled the wall.

  Her hand flew to her chest, and she stumbled back into the door. I turned on the television to mute our voices if her mom wandered down the hall.

  “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

  She looked up at me, the flickering television highlighting one side of her face and the darkness of the room shadowing the other. “My brother and Evie are downstairs.”

  “I watched them pull out of the driveway thirty seconds ago.”

  “Why are you here?”

  I didn’t know why I was here. No, that was a lie. My plan to fuck away my need for this woman last night backfired big time, making me crave her more than before I touched her. On some level, last night was the worst decision I’d ever made, and I’d made a lot of bad decisions in my life. However, that didn’t stop me from crawling back for more tonight.

  “I wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Lock the door so we can talk.”

  “It’s been a crazy night.” She blew out an audible stream of air, and her shoulders hunched over. “Can’t we table this conversation until tomorrow?”

  “Jesus, do you have to be so argumentative? Lock the fucking door.”

  “This is a really bad idea.” Her hand fumbled behind her back. “No one found out about you being here the other night, but they’re suspicious now. They’ll be watching more closely.”

  When the lock clicked, I said, “I knew they’d be waiting for you, and I didn’t want anything to happen to you.”

  “They wouldn’t hurt me.”

  “What about Gian?” I worried about my sister being with a hard ass like Gian. Even supposing he wasn’t a sadistic son of a bitch like my father or Nico DeAngelo, my sister was soft and artsy. She loved acting and dancing, and she lived her life with her head stuck in the clouds. Gian ruled the men under him with an iron fist. I’d slit his throat if he broke Evie’s spirit.

  Carmela studied me for a moment, her teeth worrying her lower lip. “Gian’s protective of the people he loves, including your sister. You don’t have to worry about him with her, you know. He would never hurt her or me. You’ve never come right out and asked about him, but I think you might be curious. You miss her, don’t you?”

  Her proclamation hung in the air, baiting me. I refused to bite. I couldn’t talk about my sister with her. Evie’s absence in my life felt too raw. The state of our relationship made a mockery out of all of the days we spent catching up after I got home from New York every summer. We’d get lost in the cornfields neighboring our property, eating raw corn until our stomachs ached, and making promises to always be close. It didn’t look like that was in the cards anymore.

  “What’d they say?” I asked, changing the subject, hating the choppiness in my voice.

  “Nothing important. They’re worried about me.”

  “That’s it?”

  She padded across the patterned carpet floor and sprawled out on her bed. She closed her eyes, leaving a soft, relaxed look on her face. “I don’t want to talk about it. I’m exhausted. I don’t think we got more than three hours of sleep last night. You should go home. You have to be exhausted too.”

  “They want you to stay away from me.” It wasn’t a question.

  “Yeah.” Her eyelids cracked open. “My brother has someone tailing me, so he knows we’ve been meeting up. Obviously, he doesn’t approve. He said he’d support my decision not to marry Nico if I stayed away from you.”

  “I’m not surprised he’s keeping tabs on you,” I answered. I couldn’t blame Gian for wanting her to stay away from me. It showed he cared about her. I respected that.

  “What are we going to do?”

  I crossed the room, removed her shoes, and rubbed the arches of each foot. “We’re going to go to bed. Get some rest
, and we’ll figure out a plan later.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  She propped herself up on her elbows, and her dark wavy hair looked like an inky waterfall next to the moonlit white duvet. “Don’t you think that’s risky?”

  “I don’t care.” I shimmied her fitted black pants down her legs, and she pulled her shirt over her head and unclasped her bra. A pang shot through me as I took in the image in front of me. Her golden eyes glowed in the dim light. Her nipples were dark pink and hard, her skin like silk. Her curves made my mouth water and my dick come to attention. I never understood how Laney could crave drugs enough to ruin her life. Looking at Carmela, I finally identified with the freedom in losing control because I was damn close to jumping into the abyss with her. Nothing good would come of my growing attachment, and despite knowing this deep in the recesses of my soul, I couldn’t stop myself from reaching for her time and time again.

  I tossed my keys and wallet on her dresser and climbed on the bed. I hovered above her, trying to decide what I wanted to do first. There were so many options. So many things left to explore. So many things to check off my list before I had to hand her over to that asshole Nico forever.

  Holding her jaw in one hand, I pressed my mouth against hers. Her tongue dove through my lips, swirling, tasting, and setting my cock on fire.

  “What about your clothes?” she asked, her lips still against mine, her voice breathy, and her body vibrating with unconcealed desire.

  I came to my knees and grabbed the hem of my t-shirt, yanking it over my head. I unbuckled my pants and pushed them down my hips. I could get used to having this woman next to me every night.

  I lowered my body to hers, barely holding back a groan when my skin met hers. “I think I like you more than I should.”

  “No, you only like screwing me. That’s what you told me last night.”

  “Hmm, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I would never say anything like that.”

  A knock thudded against her door. Her eyes flared. Her chest rose and fell rapidly against the pads of my fingers.