Chasing Forever Read online

  After lunch, they went into Vail and he stopped to buy her a Vail hat from a tourist shop after lecturing her about the strength of the summer mountain sun, but more importantly he wanted her to have something to remember their time together even if it was small and insignificant. They ate at a sidewalk café where they shared a bottle of wine and mussels. By the time they piled into the car for the airport, Lucas knew he had shared two absolutely perfect days with Regan, and he wanted more time with her to see where it would lead.

  Unfortunately, he didn’t know what Regan wanted. He wanted to ask her about her relationship with Parker, about the plan for work next week, and a million other things, but he didn’t want to pressure her. She’d finally let down her guard with him again, and he didn’t want her to pull away, but with work looming over them, they needed to have a serious talk.

  ***

  When their plane took off an hour later, Lucas pulled her hand into his lap and smiled.

  She rested her head against his shoulder. “I’m tired,” she said, yawning.

  “Don’t sleep yet.”

  “Why not?” she asked, closing her eyes.

  He kissed the top of her head. “I want to talk about next week.”

  “What about it?”

  “We need to discuss what we’re going to do when we get back to San Francisco and go into work on Monday.”

  “Okay,” she said, shifting in her seat to look at him, hesitant and unsure.

  “When we go back to work on Monday, I think we should keep everything professional. I don’t think anyone at work needs to know what happened between us. Let’s keep this uncomplicated.”

  Her stomach dropped. This conversation sounded faintly reminiscent of a conversation they had six years ago when she asked why he acted differently when his friends were around. He’d blown off the conversation, and told her his life was complicated, which made sense given what happened later. Not sharing their relationship with coworkers was probably a good idea, but she didn’t like the idea of being his dirty little secret either. “So what would you suggest?” she asked attempting to keep her voice light and unconcerned.

  He rubbed his thumb over her wrist. “I really want to continue seeing you, but until your summer associate position ends, I think we need to keep it between us. I don’t want to jeopardize your future whether it’s at Martin and Black or some other firm.”

  She nodded.

  “We should establish some rules of conduct so we both know what to expect, and no one gets hurt.”

  For some reason, not entirely founded in rational thought, his statement angered her more than she’d ever admit, and a tiny part of her wanted to hurt him too. Tugging her hand out of his grasp, she ran her hands through her hair, pushing it out of her face. “You’re right. We both have a lot of things going on right now. Maybe we should shelve this until the end of the summer when we’ve both had time to think about it with a clear head.”

  His eyes narrowed, and he didn’t seem as though he liked her answer. “Other than work, what are you referring to?”

  “Well, technically, I’m still dating Parker.”

  “You said you went on two dates with him. That doesn’t count as dating him or at least that’s what you said a week ago. Did something change you didn’t tell me about?”

  “Yes, we went on two dates, but we do have another scheduled for next weekend, and I can’t cancel. He asked me a few weeks ago.”

  “Wait, let me get this straight. Last night you slept in my bed, yet you fully intend to continue dating Parker.”

  “It’s not like that,” Regan said weakly, her words sounding hollow even to her own ears.

  Lucas folded his arms across his chest. “Then what is it like?”

  Not sure what to say, Regan pulled her purse into her lap, looking for something, anything to avoid looking at him. “He asked me to his brother’s engagement party. I can’t flake because his whole family will be there. I don’t want to embarrass him.” She pulled a piece of gum out of the side pocket of her purse and stuffed it in her mouth.

  “You’re already meeting his family,” he said with a blank look on his face, the spark in his amber eyes dull. “Interesting.”

  “It’s not like that,” she repeated as she reached out to grab his arm, and he flinched, then pulled away as though he couldn’t stand her touch. “Lucas, listen to me,” said pleaded, her voice turning desperate. She may have wanted to hurt him or his ego, but she didn’t want him to be angry, not like this.

  “What’s there to say? I get it. You had a fun couple days, but you still want to keep your options open, play the field, see if there’s anything better out there.” Anger radiated off of him.

  “No!” She yelled, causing the people on the other side of the aisle to turn and look at her. She grabbed his hand again and pulled it into her lap, with enough force that he couldn’t pull away without making a scene. “Parker and I have been friends for over two years, and yes we went on a few dates, but I have no intention of pursuing anything with him. If I felt anything for him other than friendship, nothing would have happened between us this weekend. I know it looks bad, but I don’t play games with people.”

  “Then don’t go with him next weekend,” he demanded, his face still tight with anger.

  She leaned her forehead against his shoulder inhaling his clean, spicy scent and she didn’t know what to say. She didn’t want to go with Parker, but she promised and more than anything Parker was her friend. As for Lucas, she wanted him so much her heart hurt, but she couldn’t trust herself when it came to him. She already craved him as much if not more than six years ago and that scared her. He could destroy her and tie her into knots with one heated look or his provocative smile.

  “He’s my friend and I hate to break a promise. I’m not okay hurting him,” she murmured into his side.

  He placed one of his hands on her back, then he leaned in and kissed the top of her head, coaxing a slight shiver out of her. “I know, but he wants to be more than friends, and I’m not okay with that.”

  “You don’t have to be,” she said, peering up at him, a soft smile on her face. “Nothing will happen between Parker and me.”

  “How can you promise that?”

  She rubbed her temples in frustration. “Because I don’t want to be with him. Nothing will change my mind.”

  “What if I wanted to go to dinner with a woman who wanted a relationship with me, but I assured you I wasn’t interested in them?” He laced his fingers through hers. “Would you be okay with that?”

  She opened her mouth to say she wouldn’t mind, but then stopped herself. Who was she kidding? She hated the thought of Lucas within five feet of another woman so there was no way she’d be okay with him going on a date with someone else regardless of his intentions. “No,” she finally admitted. “I don’t want you to date anyone else.”

  “Then tell him we’re together and you have to decline the invitation.”

  She didn’t want to tell Parker about Lucas specifically, especially after what she said about him. “I’ll tell him that I’m seeing someone and that I can’t accept his invitation,” she clarified.

  Lucas scowled. “Why do I think there’s a story behind that?”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, trying to deflect the question.

  “You said you’d tell him you’re seeing someone rather than you’re seeing me.”

  She laughed. “It’s not a big deal. Besides,” she shrugged, “you said you wanted to keep our relationship secret until the end of the summer.”

  “I don’t want to keep it secret. We need to keep it secret. There’s a big difference. If it didn’t matter, I’d tell everyone and anyone who would listen.”

  With that small explanation, he chipped away more of her reservations about their future. “I would too,” she said, surprising herself with how much she meant it.

  Tipping up her chin, he cradled her face with such sincerity and tenderness that her throat con
stricted. Slowly, cautiously, his lips found hers. The kiss was too hot and too intimate for the semi-public venue of the plane. But hidden in the sweetness of the kiss, there was something so raw and possessive that when he pulled away from her she felt more alive and on edge than ever before. Looking down, she noticed her hands shook, but she couldn’t stop her reaction if she tried.

  “So what are the rules for work?” she asked.

  “Nothing too complicated. We just need to keep everything professional—no closed doors, no diverted lunch meetings, no closets. You get the idea.”

  She laughed to hide the ripple of unease skating through her mind. “Why do I get the feeling you’ve done this before?”

  “I don’t kiss and tell, but just to make you feel better, I haven’t dated anyone at Martin and Black.”

  She released a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. “It’s none of my business, but I didn’t know if had to worry about a spurned ex at work.”

  “Nope, not at work.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  “And so what happens at work on Monday?”

  Lucas shrugged in response. “We pretend as if nothing happened.”

  Lucas and Drew sat on a park bench after their run, a few blocks from their street. The morning fog still hadn’t lifted, and the park was completely empty, but Lucas didn’t care. He stuck to his work-week exercise schedule, even on the weekends. He couldn’t break the habit.

  “Do you think you can do that?”

  Lucas took a drink from his water bottle. “I don’t have any choice.”

  “And what did Regan think of that?”

  Lucas bent over to tie his shoe. “I don’t think she likes it, but we don’t have any choice. I can’t exactly tell the partners I’m screwing one of the summer associates. Well, not if I want to keep my job and make partner sometime in the foreseeable future.”

  “And is that what this about, screwing the summer associate?”

  Lucas sat up and looked over at Drew. “No. Not even close.” He didn’t offer an explanation. He knew he didn’t have to. It was written all over his face. He loved Regan. In fact, if he were honest with himself, he never stopped loving her.

  “Jesus, are you serious?” Drew asked, completely stunned.

  “Yes.”

  “Is this something you realized on your little business trip together?”

  “No,” Lucas said, shaking his head.

  Drew lowered his voice. “How long have you felt that way?”

  Lucas ran his hands through his sweat-dampened hair. “For too long,” he answered evasively.

  “Since the beginning of this summer or since college?”

  “Are you trying to make me feel like a jackass?” Did he have to spell it out? He didn’t mind bouncing ideas off Drew, but sharing his feelings was something entirely different. Drew had been his closest friend for more years than he could count, but his feelings for Regan were personal, too personal for a casual conversation after a run, especially when he hadn’t shared them with Regan.

  “No, I’m just morbidly curious on the inner workings of your mind.”

  “Fine. Probably since the night I met her.” Are you always such a smooth talker, Lucas Evanston? He’d spent years denying it, but the moment she asked him that question with her sassy smile and glowing green eyes, he was sunk, quite literally. There had never been another woman for him and there never would be.

  Drew laughed. “Wow, that sucks for you.”

  “Thanks for reminding me.” Lucas stood up and started stretching his legs.

  “On a brighter note, I’m convinced you’ll be able to conceal your feelings for her at work.”

  Lucas peered over at Drew. “Why is that?”

  “You’ve successfully hidden them for over six years. What’s another month?”

  “Maybe,” Lucas answered, not convinced because a month seemed like an eternity when he’d already lost six years with her.

  ***

  Monday morning, Regan sat in her office staring at the cappuccino she discovered waiting on her desk when she walked in earlier this morning. Strangely, she had convinced herself Lucas would forget about the cappuccino. He’d already won her over, and now that something was actually happening between them, they really needed to be careful at work. They couldn’t take any risks.

  Lucas asked her to dinner on Saturday and then brunch on Sunday, and she declined both times. She claimed she had errands to do, but in truth, she needed some separation from him so she could function at work this week.

  Also, she could easily evade Lucas’s questions about Parker by text and voicemail. In person, Lucas would press her on the issue, and she couldn’t explain why she hadn’t called Parker and told him she couldn’t go with him to his brother’s engagement party. After going back and forth, she decided to wait to tell Parker until their shift at the restaurant on Thursday. While that didn’t give Parker much time to find another date, she thought she owed it to him to offer him an explanation in person. What that explanation would include, she still didn’t have a clue, but she knew Lucas would have some strong opinions on the matter.

  As if on cue, Lucas walked into her office shutting the door behind him. “Good morning.”

  “Good morning to you,” she responded.

  She glanced at the closed door nervously. “Do you think it’s a good idea to close the door?”

  “I’ve sat in closed rooms with you before,” he answered, walking behind her desk to where she sat. “What’s the big deal?”

  “That was before.”

  Bending his head, he brushed his lips across hers. “Before what?” he asked, smiling mischievously, and her heart fluttered in her chest. Did he have to be so beautiful?

  “Don’t play this game. You said we had to be careful. I’m just following your rules.”

  “Rules?” he asked playfully as he tilted his head to the side. “I don’t recall discussing any rules.”

  “Did you already forget?” Seeing his blank look, she rolled her eyes. “No closed doors,” she said waving her hand in the direction of her door.

  He shrugged unconcerned. “I didn’t see you all weekend, and I needed a few minutes alone with you without any prying eyes.”

  “Oh, so there are exceptions to your rules,” she commented with raised eyebrows.

  He chuckled. “Of course. They’re my rules. I can make exceptions. I’m your boss.”

  At the reminder, she froze. “We made the rules to protect our careers—actually, to protect my career. If we’re caught in an inappropriate situation, I’m the one who will be fired.”

  He sighed. “I think we’d both be screwed, but it’s not going to happen. I came in here to spend a few minutes with you, not to molest you. Although, I’m tempted to do so now that we’re alone.”

  She laughed and waved her finger at him. “Be good.”

  “I’m trying, but…” he leaned in and inhaled her scent, “you smell amazing and your hair…” he twisted a smooth auburn strand that had fallen from her hair clip around his finger, “drives me crazy when it’s up like this, exposing your neck.” His finger trailed down her neck and she trembled.

  She looked toward the door. “You need to give me some space or we’re going to get caught.”

  Sighing, he leaned away from her. He rubbed the back of his neck while looking at the ceiling and then dropped both of his hands to the side. “You intentionally evaded me all weekend. Why?”

  Crap. Instinctually, she wanted to deny it, but then she saw his face. He looked vulnerable, and she didn’t like seeing him like that. “I needed a little time alone,” she said softly.

  He studied her face and she stood up and opened her laptop. His intense scrutiny made her uncomfortable. She’d thought a little personal space this weekend would give her time to find herself again, but she didn’t know how to explain that to him.

  He turned her around to face him again. “Having second thoughts?”

  “No,”
and then without thinking, she said, “should I?”

  Staring at her, he reached forward trailing his fingertip along her cheek. Longing for his touch, she leaned into him involuntarily, almost like a magnet unable to resist the pull.

  He slid his hand into her hair and released it from the clip holding it away from her face. Gently, he guided her face toward him, his eyes never leaving hers. “Maybe I need to remind you what is so good about us.”

  “Lucas, don’t. Not here—” she protested, not sounding firm, even to her own ears.

  “Yes, here,” he whispered sliding her skirt up her legs, exposing her bare thighs. His eyes never leaving hers, he lifted her on to the top of her desk, and pushed her legs open as he moved between them. What the hell was he doing to her? Her body was already begging her to ignore her better judgment and let him do what he wanted with her.

  He tilted her face up and she watched his golden eyes flare with lust. Good, he was as gone as her. Slowly, he brushed his lips against hers and a jolt of heat rushed through her. She whimpered as she pulled him closer, trying to catch his tongue and pull him into her in any way possible. Would it be bad if someone found them naked sprawled across her desk?

  Hearing voices right outside her office door, she tried to pull away. “Wait. Not here. We need to stop,” she protested halfheartedly, but she didn’t mean it. She didn’t know if she could stop, even if she had to. She needed one more taste.

  “Not yet,” he murmured against her lips. “Just a little longer. I haven’t touched you for days.” He pressed his body against hers harder, more possessively than before. “No one will come in without knocking.” His tongue ran over her lips coaxing her to accept him until she opened to him. Within seconds, she didn’t care where they were or who saw them.

  His hand moved down her neck and along the side of her breast, teasing and taunting her, and she whimpered into his mouth. Breathing hard, he dragged his mouth away from hers and ran his nose along her neck. He flexed into her so she could feel his hard length against her, and her hips jerked recklessly toward him begging for more contact.